Darren Shattiwoe Declares Victory in Debate, Covered in His Own Shite

It’s Halloween season, and as the veil between worlds grows thin, the fascists wanking dead are awakening.

In the digital wasteland where people gather to throw tomatoes (and occasionally faeces) at each other, otherwise known as “debate”, things took a dark, sticky turn this week.

Local wanking dead Darren Shattiwoe, already known for confusing "having an opinion" with "snorting his own discharge", decided to treat the crowd to a performance piece titled “Man Covered in His Own Shite Shouts About Migrants.”

Witnesses report that at first, Darren’s opponent, Valentin French, was playing along.“He was enjoying the banter,” said a spectator, “calling them fascists, reminding them how the ‘Great Replacement’ is actually just capitalism in drag.”But it all went downhill fast.

When Darren began literally playing with his own excrement — metaphorically at first, then distressingly not — Valentin decided it was time to log off.

“I thought he might realise it was embarrassing,” said Valentin. “Instead, he leapt up, flinging chunks of his ideology around, screaming: ‘YOU’RE RUNNING AWAY BECAUSE I’M RIGHT!’”

Locals say Darren is still at it.

Witnesses describe him “bouncing in circles like a deranged kangaroo, dripping ideological diarrhoea and shouting that he’s not racist, just honest.”