📖 Fascist Lexicon A–Z (part 1)

To help you navigate the murky swamp of fascist rhetoric, we took a brave dive into a few “Says No” Facebook pages.

What we found was less a political philosophy and more a collection of angry pub rants, conspiracy memes, and brain farts dressed up as deep thought.

A – Alternative Media

Facebook groups where our aunt’s cousin’s neighbour’s dog confirms our worldview. Bonus points if it’s a Telegram channel with a name like Freedom Patriots Ireland 1776.

B – Border Control

WALLS. GUNS. DEPORTATIONS.(Except when we go working illegally in Australia or the US. Then it’s just “being adventurous.”)

C – Catholicism

Our sacred culture. Except we’re divorced, don’t go to mass, and the Pope is a commie. Still, Ireland is “Catholic.”

China

It’s cool how they kill corrupt politicians. But the idea of being fined for drunk driving, tax fraud, or wife-beating? That’s tyranny. Freedom means breaking laws when we want.

Corruption

Bad. Unless we are the ones buying politicians, then it’s just “freedom of speech with cash.”

COVID

A fake sickness cooked up by communists, aliens, Bill Gates, and probably witches. Created to wipe out the clever white population (yes, the ones who think “doing their own research” means watching a Facebook Live).

D – Democracy

System where we’re always right, even if we’re just six lads in a pub with pints and hi-viz jackets.

E – Education

Indoctrination. Real education stopped at junior high, which is the true peak of civilization.

F – Fascism

See Communism. (We literally don’t know the difference, but shouting it feels smart).

G – Great Replacement

White people replaced by brown people so aliens and communists can ruin Christmas.

H – History

Whatever we rewrite it to be. Colonization never happened, and Hitler was a socialist.

I – Islam

Not our culture! Poo poo religion. Totally fine in their “savage countries,” but here in our “Christian land” (where no one goes to church), it’s terrorism.

J – Journalism

Fake news unless it’s Gript, Breitbart, or a meme page run by a 15-year-old incel named Kyle.

K – Kids

Our property. Beaten for discipline, married off for culture, used in Facebook photos for clout. Grooming? That’s just gender theory propaganda!

L – Law & Order

Police to bash migrants, never us. Taxes, speed limits, domestic violence laws = oppression.

M – Make Ireland Great Again

Bring Ireland back to the golden age: February 30th, 1994.

N – Nostalgia

Longing for an imaginary past where everyone was white, sober, and straight. (In reality, Grandpa was drunk, gay, and beating the cows).

O – Oppression

When someone calls us racist, bans our hate memes, or refuses to let us beat the wife.

P – Patriot

Sucking American dick with such devotion we beg Trump to invade Ireland.

Q – QAnon

A holy book where every crackpot theory about Hillary eating babies is true.

R – Racists

Definitely not us! We LOVE people. Just our girls are meant to be fucked by white dicks, our houses are for white families, and our country for white people.

S – Science

Fake unless it’s IQ tests from 1910. Climate change is a hoax, but chemtrails are real.

Small/Medium Businesses 

The holy grail of fascist economics. Everyone should be one, unless you dare to support migrants or foreigners. Then we’ll harass you, film you with our cracked iPhones, and demand you “explain yourself” as if we had any legal authority.

T – Taxes

Tyranny. We dodge them with cash in hand, then cry about “globalist cashless conspiracies.” (See also: Taxpayers’ Money).

Taxpayers’ Money 

Sacred funds meant to bribe politicians into our values (which have the intellectual depth of a dead slug). Totally fine to spend it on useless military parades, not ok to spend it on feeding kids.

(See also: Taxes.)

U – UN (United Nations)

Satan’s headquarters. A den of lizard people, Soros, and immigrants plotting to ban Christmas.

V – Veiled Women

Either oppressed victims or undercover terrorists.

W – Welfare (a.k.a. Parasite Class)

Leeches, except our white grandpa and our sister, because they “deserve” it.

X – Xenophobia

Word invented by woke elites. What we call “common sense.”

Y – Youth

Brainwashed if progressive, heroes if they drop out at 11 and join our protests with beer in hand.