Inside the Fap Right: Ireland’s Growing Army of Self-Fondling Patriots

Rosa Liechtenstein, with sociologist John Lenin

Across Irish Facebook, a strange phenomenon is taking place. Once-normal users who used to get ads for “cheap stoves” or “local garden centres” are now being targeted with something far darker: political ads suggesting it’s now perfectly respectable to be “Fap Right.”

Whole pages have sprung up lately with names like Snollygoster Vanguard, Cockalorum Says No, Pillock Nationwide Watch, and Off Grid Mooncalfs.

Their members are proudly racist, misogynist, homophobic, transphobic, and every other flavour of hate you can spread across a status update.

They post videos of themselves harassing people, vandalising property, and lecturing people in the name of “freedom.” It’s a digital sewer of self-righteous gobshites who’ve mistaken their fear for political awakening.

So who are these people?

“They’re afraid of losing what little they have.” — John Lenin

John Lenin explains:

“Most of them aren’t destitute. They’ve got a house, a car, maybe a small business. They work, they eat, and they lie awake at night terrified that someone might take away their Sky subscription or their child’s bunk bed. They’ve seen what happens during crises, small businesses close, working people lose out, and they’re desperate to protect what little privilege they still have.”

Rosa: So, middle class then?

“Sometimes, yes,” says Lenin. “But plenty of them have nearly nothing, except the privilege of feeling better than women or people of colour. That tiny crumb of superiority is their only inheritance, and they’ll defend it with ferocity. That’s why pages like Dipsticks Says No have thousands of followers.”

Fascists with Smartphones

When asked whether the Fap Right can rightly be called fascists, Lenin doesn’t hesitate.

“Absolutely. They’ve revived methods that died out in most of Western Europe: vigilante groups, mobs of violent teens attacking people for speaking another language, following cars and trucks, harassing workers. It’s classic fascist behaviour, only now they film themselves doing it and upload it like it’s reality TV.”

Many of these so-called “digital creators” are tied to fringe political parties, using their content to recruit violent little patriots both online and off. The cosy cross-posting between politicians and thugs leaves little doubt about the connection.

The Fragility Behind the Fury

Rosa: Aside from being deeply unpleasant, what’s the danger of these Fap Right groups?

“Their fragility is the danger,” says Lenin. “They’re terrified of losing control, over their homes, their women, their children, even their recycling bins. And fragile people with delusions of grandeur are the backbone of every fascist movement. Give them power, and Ireland becomes a nightmare for people of colour, migrants, queer folks, anyone who doesn’t fit their idea of purity.”

Already, we’ve seen them threatening and burning IPAS centres, proudly filming themselves committing crimes, and calling it “patriotism.”

The Great Wankspiracy: Understanding the “New World Order”

Rosa: They love ranting about something called the “New World Order.” What the hell is that supposed to be?

“It’s a conspiracy stew with strong antisemitic roots,” explains Lenin. “They pretend to hate capitalism but actually fear losing their petty privileges. They imagine shadowy elites plotting against them: billionaires, feminists, migrants, and whoever else they feel threatened by that week.”

He lists the Fap Right’s favourite delusions:

• Schools teaching “woke” ideas to destroy the family.

• Migrants stealing homes they could never afford anyway.

• Halal food secretly proving Ireland is already an Islamic caliphate.

• Vaccines and lesbians plotting to “erase the white race.”

“It’s all projection,” says Lenin. “They don’t understand capitalism or power, they just want someone to blame. The ‘New World Order’ becomes a catch-all fantasy that explains everything they fear while making them feel heroic.”

Against Capitalism? Don’t Make Us Laugh

Rosa: But they say they’re fighting the elites, doesn’t that make them anti-capitalist?

“Not at all,” laughs Lenin. “They just want to keep capitalism exactly as it is, minus the last fifty years of progress. They’re not revolutionaries; they’re nostalgic reactionaries who think equality ruined everything. They don’t want to end exploitation; they want to choose who gets exploited.”

In Conclusion

The Irish Fap Right are not freedom fighters or rebels. They’re frightened little people clutching their Sky remotes, terrified the world won’t stay built for them.They don’t challenge power, they reinforce it.

Or as John Lenin puts it:

“They want to make Ireland great again, as long as ‘great’ means white, male, and barely literate.”