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Far-Right Meltdown: Three Local Fascists Compete for “Most Persecuted Man in Ireland” Title
The fascist internet is bubbling again! In an impromptu race to victimhood, three local champions of mediocrity — Sean O’Eejit from...
Joseph Stallone
Oct 11, 20252 min read
Cram O’Broda Outraged After Nobel Prize Fails to Recognize His Tireless Crusade Against Woke Tyranny
The 2025 Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded to Venezuelan opposition leader María Corina Machado , a woman whose courage and activism for...
Confuse fascists until they shit themselves
Oct 10, 20252 min read
Pope Leo XIV to Canonize Ballybollocks Man While Still Alive, “A Living Saint of Self-Righteousness”
VATICAN CITY — In what theologians are calling “a divine clerical error,” Pope Leo XIV has announced his wish to meet Brad Full...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 10, 20252 min read
Olympic Committee Considers Adding “Fascist Cognitive Gymnastics” as New Discipline
In an exciting announcement for world politics (and for the local pub philosophers of Facebook), the International Olympic Committee is...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 10, 20252 min read
Golden Raspberry Awards to Honour “Far-Right Irishness” in New Category
The Golden Raspberry Awards, known worldwide for honouring the worst of cinema, have reportedly discovered a brand-new art form:...
Red Noses for Brown Shirts
Oct 9, 20251 min read
This Halloween, a spectre is haunting Children — the spectre of communism.
Forget razor blades in apples or ecstasy in chocolate bars. The real danger this year is ideological, and according to local Facebook...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 8, 20252 min read
Oldfartle Says No: Protecting Ireland from Imaginary Undocumented and Unvetted Migrants.
In the tranquil village of Oldfartle, where time stopped somewhere between The Angelus and the last episode of Fair City , locals have...
Rosa Liechtenstein
Oct 8, 20252 min read
“Wanking Bracelet” Keeps Ireland’s Far Right Fully Charged, Researcher Claims
DUBLIN — In what critics are calling the most useful invention for fascists since the selfie stick, an Irish researcher has unveiled a...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 7, 20252 min read
Brad Full O’Shite fears halal food: “I don’t want to wake up Algerian”
CARRICHRIST-ON-A-BIKE , Local hero and part-time Facebook philosopher, Brad Full O’Shite , is once again warning the population against...
Louis Michelle
Oct 6, 20252 min read
Local Vigilante Furious Over “Digital Identity,” Says Only He’s Allowed to Police People
CARRICHRIST-ON-A-CRACKER – Local hero of the Facebook group Carrichrist-On-a-Cracker Says No , Brad O’Lffitler, has announced his latest...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 5, 20251 min read
Carrichrist-On-a-Cracker Man Responds to In-Flight Medical Emergency Armed Only With ‘Own Research’ and Facebook Comments
Passengers on a budget flight from Alicante to Knock were treated to high drama yesterday when a call went out for a doctor mid-air,–...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 4, 20252 min read
BALLYBOLLOCKS – A local man, Shawn O’Dikshit, has made what he calls a “major scientific breakthrough” after a long crusade against tap water and the birth control pills hiding inside it.
Shawn first became alarmed when he “witnessed gay sex among fish” during what he described as “real field work”, three hours in front of...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Oct 3, 20252 min read
Local Psychologist Warns Positive Parenting May Cause Wokeness, Gender Confusion, and Other Catastrophes
A local self-declared psychologist, Helen Aisteach, has sounded the alarm on the dangers of “positive parenting,” warning that if Irish...
Rosa Liechtenstein
Oct 2, 20252 min read
📖 Fascist Lexicon A–Z (part 1)
To help you navigate the murky swamp of fascist rhetoric, we took a brave dive into a few “Says No” Facebook pages. What we found was...
Rosa Liechtenstein
Oct 1, 20253 min read
BREAKING: Amateur Scientists Now So Advanced Harvard Might Shut By Next Month
In what experts are calling “a tragedy of unprecedented proportions,” research institutions across the capitalist world are facing mass...
Red Noses for Brown Shirts
Oct 1, 20252 min read
Carrichrist-on-a-Bike Watch Declares Itself the Supreme Court, the Gardaí, and the Vatican Combined
CARRICHRIST-ON-A-BIKE – The local Facebook page Carrichrist-on-a-Bike Watch has once again demonstrated its unique authority over...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Sep 30, 20251 min read
BREAKING: Local Anti-Vaxxer Earns Imaginary Medical Degree After Reading Meme About “Turbo Cancer”
A jubilant Mark O'Eejit proudly announced today that he has “finally graduated from the University of WhatsApp” after sharing an article...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Sep 30, 20251 min read
“Paper? Like in the Toilet” – Oldfartle Idiocracy Says No to Literacy
In Oldfartle, the local fascist chapter Says No is on high alert after the friend of the grandmother’s aunt of the cousin of the...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Sep 30, 20252 min read
Rise in Dog Depression Linked to Culchie Vigilantes Taking Over Traditional Canine Roles, Experts Warn
In a shocking new development, local veterinary clinics across rural Ireland are reporting a surge in canine depression, with distressed...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Sep 30, 20251 min read
Local Wannabe Fascist Politician Takes “Marking Territory” to New Lows
In a bold move nobody asked for, a local wannabe fascist politician has taken his activism out of the comment sections of Ballydumbs Says...
The Shitehawk Sentinel
Sep 29, 20251 min read
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